How Saying 'No' Got Me to 6-Figures in Just 3 Months
Updated: Aug 23
If you are working too hard, but have not reached your financial freedom yet, this post is for you!
A few years ago, my world looked pretty different.
I counted that in one year I worked with 100 clients! I remember coming home after another amazing healing workshop and sharing with my husband how many lives I had changed, how many women walked out enlightened and transformed. And he would predictably annoy the heck out of me by replying: "Show me the money!"
The truth was, I worked so much but had nothing to show for it!
The little that I made I paid for another marketing school and an online course, another mindset retreat and a networking conference. The more 'lead generating' formulas I learned, the more 'deep healing mindset work' I did, the more confused and insecure I became.
Something must be really wrong with me... if after putting in so much effort, I am still in the same boat.
The truth was, that I didn't own the 20 years of expertise and experience I already had.
I was focusing on marketing my skills, but not on developing and selling my skills!
I will explain to you how understanding the difference completely changed my business.
It all began with saying 'No'!
First I had to say 'No' to BS that was happening in all of the big group business and marketing schools and academies I went to.
I stopped hoping that if I dance with other struggling women entrepreneurs, calling themselves a sisterhood, a tribe or a vortex, I will improve my business.
I stopped giving standing ovations to another 8-figure Transformational Business Guru teaching me her steps from the stage. I've already tried those steps and they didn't work for me! (I figured out why, read on to find out.)
Manifesting the abundance of wealth and joy by raising my vibrations just stoped being enough. Every affirmation or intention I made at that time was about 'getting clients', every picture on my vision board had a dollar sign on it. I couldn't help, but constantly worry about money.
I just wanted to get paid!
In reality, after being sold into another 'Growth, wealth, accelerator business program' I felt disappointed. Here is why. (Does it sound familiar?)
I couldn't implement the 'magic proven formulas' because I didn't have a 7-figure advertising budget the 'Guru' told us she used to 'test' her system.
The Guru didn't lie...that is exactly how much you need to bring hundreds of clients into your programs consistently.
Selling cheap info-products, so popular in the 'men's dot com world' wasn't an option neither.
I was not a tech wizard. SEO, Ad-words, bump-ups, and funnels wasn't something I would understand at the time.
I am a pro now, but, guess what, just knowing how it works doesn't guarantee success. You still have to invest into testing and launching. As a beginner coach, I had next to zero budget for that.
All I wanted was to make cash, so I wouldn't be so embarrassed to call myself a kickass lady-boss, or whatever else women freelancers call themselves these days.
I wanted to be proud of my work. See that look on my husband's face when I take him and my kids on the beach holiday.
I hired myself a serious mentor.
I insisted to work with her privately. At the time I could only afford one hour with her. She allowed me to spread that hour over four 15 min sessions.
Just a month later I was in business!
I understood the power of getting tough-love feedback and straight to the point instructions. I started to understand what I am actually selling. I stopped the hustle. I focused on creating my method and getting my clients outstanding results.
I spent the next 6 months catching up with my new mindset. I positioned myself above the pool of coaches trying to sell coaching. I had courage to stand alone and create my own niche.
Then I invested in my next Big Shot sales coach. I recovered my several 5-figure investment in 2 weeks, because I was scared out of my wits. Honestly, when I signed up to work with her, I only had money to pay my first installment.
I raised me fees from $100/hr to $1000/hr. (I am charging way more for the private work now).
I remember calling my friend after my new client paid me one thousand dollars for a 60 min Strategy Session. (Can you imagine, my coaching schools had been telling me to give it away for free!!!)
I felt so proud of myself. My friend said, of course, you absolutely deserve it!
We both agreed, how painful it is to watch brilliant highly trained women experts being undervalued everywhere in life. I told my friend, and I promised myself, never to disrespect my work, my gifts, ever again!
The truth was, I couldn't have done it without knowing how to get phenomenal results for my clients, position myself and close 5-figure sales.
However, saying 'No' to phony inspirational gurus and their 'magic formulas' was only the first thing.
To position myself above my competition I had to say 'No' to what was going on in the coaching industry.
Then I had to say 'No' to less-than ideal coaching clients.
I said 'No' to Freebies.
Yes, I pissed some people off, lost couple of friends, but gained 14 new clients who readily paid me $10,000 each. 50% of those new clients were the people I knew and coached for free for months.
Now, when I teach how to get out of 'friend' zone with people who regularly 'pick your brains', my clients say, Lira, you made me grow balls. :)
Yep, this is most likely what it would feel like.
Setting boundaries is tough.
That leads me to my next most important 'No'.
Most of what I had to do in business felt unpleasant.
Earlier I told you how I thought that something must be wrong with me, because I don't seem to enjoy the flow.
I believed that attracting clients and closing sales has to be easy and effortless.
I was told to 'just use my intuition', follow my goddess bliss and pleasure and that I deserve abundance and it is my birth right. Business should just happen, because I changed my limiting beliefs about money.
Well, my pleasure-seeking 'sisters' still gather in circles, glue magazine pictures of their fancy retreat houses on their vision boards, light candles, journal about their feelings, whisper affirmations how money flows easily their way, and channel 7-D downloads to enlighten humanity.
I invest, learn and implement!
I have a sustainable 6-figure coaching business that I run on 2 hours per day, 4 days a week.
I said 'No' to believing my business will grow by itself.
I said 'No' to believing people will find me without marketing.
I said 'No' to believing I can make money without asking to get paid.
I accepted the simple truth of energy: you get what you put in.
Somehow the Napoleon Hill lovers missed his first statement from 'Think and Grow Rich', "You can't have something for nothing'.
Well, in my expert opinion, Napoleon Hill was absolutely right!
Business loves strategy, people love value.
You get paid your worth, when you deliver on your promise.
You get paid more when you are an exception, not an average.
You get paid even more when you know how to articulate your brilliance.
When you are paid more, you don't need as many clients.
That means you don't need any 'magic formulas' or advertising budgets to get you thousands of leads.
You can actually have an easy business.
My invitation to you today is to take a reality check.
I say, and people started sharing it with a hashtag, # Reality Check Is a New Spirituality.
If you truly want to reach your potential as a spiritual being walking this human path, if you want your life to make a difference, if you want to realize your purpose, and also experience joy and abundance in your daily life, begin with saying 'No' to everything that takes you away from your dream.
Say 'No' to distractions, lies and sabotaging behavior.
Make a commitment to yourself.
Start respecting your work.
Accept that building a legacy, a passion business, and even a solid 6-figures with your coaching will take effort.
You are a coach because you believe in support. You understand the power of a great mentor. For me it made the biggest difference.
I couldn't have imagined what a great coach look like if I didn't have one. I wouldn't believe it's possible to charge over $5,000 per coaching session if I didn't pay it myself. I wouldn't know how organic marketing works if I wasn't pushed into the right direction and encouraged to be powerful by the mentors who walked their talk.
I invite you to set firm boundaries. You won't have to explain to people what they can or can't do. You will show them how you handle things. raise your own standards, and respect will follow.
I invite you, and that is a last controversial thing I share here, to stop trying to fake it til you make it. Confidence is earned.
There's no shame in starting from nowhere.
I certainly did.
It's ok to put in the work.
You will learn to LOVE it once your efforts will start paying off!
It's ok to bite a bullet and hire somebody you know is a real deal.
I invite you to say 'No' to self sabotage and working with coaches who 'overpromise' and 'undercharge'.
Life is relatively short. Do you really want to fiddle, and struggle, and try? Statistically, most coaches give up in the first 2 years of starting their business.
But if after all of this time, you still want to do it, you still have fire in your belly, you still feel for the people who need you, then join me. I will use my professional skills, talents and gifts to help you create a solid coaching, healing or consulting business in the next 12 months.
Lira Kay is an international bestselling author, founder of School Of Inspired Life, a contemporary professional training center for expert coaches and healers.
Lira has been assisting people to transform their lives for almost 30 years, through art-therapy based workshops, psychotherapy practical seminars, transformative classes, art, international curatorial projects, coaching, speaking and spiritual healing workshops.
After traveling the world Lira settled in Walnut Creek, CA with her husband and their 5 daughters.
You can learn more about Lira’s work at www.schoolofinspiredlife.com
Lira is an author of 3 books:
Now Or Never, How to Get What You Want Every Time You Say I Wish.
I Belong, The Journey From Lost to Found.
Release 20 Pounds of Pain, Practical Guide to Quit Addictions and Create the Body to Fit Your Dreams.
Lira was born in Russia, grew up in Estonia, moved to UK in her 20-s, then lived in France, Marseille, until eventually moving to Boston, MA and then in San Francisco Bay, CA.
On the daily basis Lira is working with talented women entrepreneurs helping them to create a business based on their passions. She specializes in training coaches to become exceptionally good at their work and runs an Advanced Coaches and Healers Certification.
Her current 111 Healers Project aims to mentor 100 healers who can work alongside therapist, bringing a purpose-oriented therapy methods to the masses. The idea is that as we heal ourselves, we all affect at least 10 people around us, our immediate family and friends, and then we can take our work to the next 100 people. So here you have it: 1 individual healed, 10 more, then 100 more again.
Lira inspires people around the world to heal themselves and start giving back, living their purpose. She speaks on many international platforms, including with Fearless Woman Summit, reaching 233,000 women around the globe, regularly doing radio and video interviews and trainings, and teaching from her weekly Facebook Lives.