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  • Writer's pictureLira Kay

Ruminating Thoughts Vs Life By Design

Updated: Feb 18

How to stop having ruminating thoughts.

Have you noticed waking up early or going to bed late because of ruminating thoughts?

They might be about your relationships, or business, or money. May be you are working on a project or with a client and feel like you can't stop thinking about them.

A powerful video training bellow.

Healing is big part of having a profitable business and feeling happy in life.

Unfortunately we are not just dealing with our own past, but the past of women before us.

But before you watch the training bellow, take away some powerful method to dealing with ruminating thoughts that sabotage your easy path to success in business and in love.

So the first thing to do is to observe yourself in a process.

Oh, look at me and my ruminating thoughts again. Do it with an inner smile, like you are looking at somebody you like, a little girl or a boy, or a friend.

Start noticing the nature of your rummaging thoughts.

Are you beating yourself up, or are you trying to figure out out a solution. Are you giving a speech, or are you justifying yourself. Are you alone, or having a dialogue. Who are you speaking with.

Then observe what is your normal response to your thoughts.

Are you getting up motivated to start hustling or producing something, or are you feeling like staying in bed all day.

Now, here we discovered one of the reasons you have ruminating thoughts.

Sometimes ruminating thoughts keeps you motivated and get you out of bed. And sometimes they prevent you from getting involved, actively doing something or being with somebody.

Do your ruminating thoughts bring you energy or take away your energy?

Now comes the next juicy question: why?

What will happen if I have energy?

Or what will happen if I don't have energy?

Become even more concrete.

Specifically, what is going to happen if I don't fix this situation?

What will not happen if I don't fix this situation?

What will happen if I fix this situation?

What will not happen if I fix this situation?

You will start noticing from writing down your answers that each scenario leads to a certain outcome.

You might even feel resistant reading your answers and accepting them.

This is because you are coming face to face with your own Psyche.

Psyche is a subconscious part of you that drives your hidden agendas birthed out of the events and traumas you lived through as a child.

In the basis of your reasons to have or not to have energy is a judgment, or you also may call it, your values. What you believe is good and what you believe is bad.

Here I am not talking about some big abstract values - like helping others or praying to God, or justice, or peace, or love everyone. I'm talking about your subconscious drive in life.

If, by your childhood experience being 'involved' with people, life, environment felt bad, your ruminating thoughts have a function to protect you from getting hurt again.

If you were validated for your achievements, then ruminating thoughts add fire under your ass and keep you earning that validation day in and day out.

(By my own experience, it could be both!)

Go back to your answers and look at the complexity of all the consequences of taking action or not taking action will bring up.

This is a reality of life.

Read my article here about our fears, Your Fear Is Hiding Your Desire to understand how to work with fears around your goals and stop sabotaging your good intentions.

So one of the ways to eliminate ruminating thoughts is to accept complexity of life and create a better healthier ways to get involved with it.

After all, we can all agree that this life is worth something. As a spiritual person you probably believe you have a purpose here on earth. There's something about being alive that is precious and good... even when it's hard.

To my clients who are suffering with having ruminating thoughts after a breakup or being in a constant rut and hustle in business, I show a simple technique that helps them factually stop this pattern. But before I do we always have a conversation about a deeper reason behind ruminating thoughts and their values, conscious and unconscious.

Accepting complexity of yourself, your own psyche or psychology, and the world around you will grow you into a healthy adult capable of taking responsibility for your life. Or at least, being aware of how you get involved or avoid life with all the people, relationships, and demands it has.

Cultivating a positive open approach to life is lifetime journey.

If you need help with that, set a private session with me here. On that 60 min session we will focus what's behind your feeling, thinking and behavioral patterns, help your quit self-sabotage and co-dependencies, and move you forward in your relationships and business.

I call this session a Fast Track Psychoanalysis because within the first 15 min or so you will start seeing underling reasons behind any of your actions, rooted in your past, especially childhood.

Most of the time my clients discover that what drives them doesn't even belong to them. It's time to fly free and set your own plans to create life by design, your design, not the one you your mind creates for you on autopilot.

This is especially useful if you are working on your relationships, like marriage or parenthood or dating, while trying to cut down working hours and enjoy life when you still can.

Here you can watch a video specifically about healing generational PTSD to market and sell effectively.

Watch more testimonials here and get inspired by the phenomenal results women coaches are creating on School Of Inspired Life programs.

Take notes from this powerful presentation on how to charge over $1,000/hr as a coach.

Learn more here.

Author: Lira Kay

Lira Kay is an international bestselling author, founder of School Of Inspired Life, a professional training center for expert coaches and healers to become world-class and in high demand.

Lira started her life coaching business after doing healing, therapy and spiritual work for over 30 years, working with thousands of people around the world.

She successfully led many transformational programs, such as 90 Days to Love, Be Phenomenal: Mindset To Empower, $10K From Monday To Friday and a $100K in 100 Days Challenge, Brand Uplevel Retreat.

Her most popular programs Advanced Coaches and Healers Certification and Founders Lounge help successful coaches and thought leaders launch their own certifications, schools and academies and create a solid foundation for their 7-figure transformational business.

After traveling the world Lira lives in Walnut Creek, CA with her husband and their 5 daughters. She had recently moved to Oahu, Hawaii. You can learn more about Lira’s work at

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